How Some Bloggers Can Be Utterly Sick!1:19 AM
WARNING: This post can be utterly annoying because it's full of borrowed thoughts, grammatical errors, interrobangs, emoticons and bullshit that it poses risks of injury, potential global catastrophe – or worse, the end of mankind.
"OMG! I got an invite for an event today. I'll be wearing an Indianappleous Red Pekpek shorts later for everyone to see how fat-assed I am!? I'm so excited! I need to pose like this. Pakk! Pose like that..Pakk! Oh, wait instagram! Pose like there's no tomorrow pak pak pak! Oh, that just made my day!
Hi guys, I had this food for breakfast and I've been meaning to tell you that it's so delicious my brain couldn't find another set of adjectives to describe how good it was. It's delicious like Shawarma Rice! Yeah, like, there were so many food at the table and I love them all! Every bit of them I bit, I swallowed and I ate. Now look at me, I may be fat but deep inside I'm super hot!
OMG!!! I'm so happy. ^_^ I love this post. <3 Coz I'm making money. *woot* (@_@) </3 Bow. Rawr. Ciao!? Ciao fer now! :-})
This is blogging! Like, I'm gonna cry now out of happiness because there goes my 1000 character paid post article and I just made money out of typing mostly punctuations!! Creative writing? Fuck that. I AM the new creative in fact because I'm such a genius I created a new emoticon myself and it's called "suave smile". :-})
Random thought! I'm going to buy a second hand shoes at UK. Like, my rich grandmother revealed to me that the Loeffler Randall shoes she gave me before she died was from the UKAY UKAY. And I'm going to continue her legacy. I'll shop at the Ukay coz you know it's quite cheap there! I want you to know that everytime I go UKAY I wear my uncle's astronaut suit. Yeah, like the MASA people are there kasi and it's so kadiri making lapit to them.
I think you better look at my braces now! Not too close. . that's my tartar..now zoom out! There you go, see the shining shimmering splendid-ness of my braces! Those braces are not cheap. I bought it last March during a clearance sale at the Forever Convenience Store. It comes with free dentures too, now I can finally replace the dentures of my grandmother which I've been wearing for six years now.
Wait! PAKKK Instagram! Oh..there it goes. :-)
I look so pretty don't you think? Hahaha.
I see...there's like a food event for bloggers pala upstairs. But I wasn't informed. You know what? I should have been informed! I SHOULD HAVE BEEN INFORMED! I SHOULD HAVE BEEN INFORMED! Like, don't they know that I'm popular! I can get lots of facebook likes and I have 1500 facebook friends and I have a confidential but a decent number of twitter followers and why was I not invited to the grand launching of "ALING PASINGS KARINDERYA". OMG! I'm going to gatecrash that event. They wouldn't know that because there are lots of bloggers and I'm sure PR/Company will not care if I gatecrash because there will still be leftovers for me you know. Hahaha. I also think they won't care if I ask for an EXCLUSIVE slot and freebies because well, I'm gonna blog about the event anyway. They're only worth of my precious punctuations! Right? I'm so awesome. I know right!
This isn't the first that I came into an event with full force. Well, the last time I wasn't invited I simply contacted the PR/Company and they said yes I could come. I also announced to facebook that I got an invite from them when I actually just invited myself. Like, I'm that popular kasi eh. They gave me a slot so you cannot say I can't go to the event because I can and I will because like what I've said I'm now friends with the organizers. Like I'm so damn popular now because I'm a blogger. And even if the organizers would tell me not to come I will still gatecrash because I'm like so popular talaga. And I will make sapak whoever gets into my way with my wonder tsinelas. By the way, the brand is Habananas!
And to the senator who said I'm a blogger lang, well, read this post to discover I'm not just a blogger after all. Don't worry, you are free to copy this post and address to the senate how some endangered specie of bloggers like I do can be utterly sick! Oh..that reminds me I forgot to take my meds this morning. Like I was diagnosed kasi of a pangmayaman lang na illness which you're never gonna have.
I will blog about the food event later so watch out for my next post ha? And also my next pose.
I'm Inday Stariray of. . .
Till next post.
Mua Mua Mua. . Tsup Tsup Tsup! <3
This is a work of fiction, any resemblance to real life was mere coincidence.
But if you feel not, the end is near, feel free to get hit by falling stars.